Stupid Village
by WhitneyMcDonald
Summary: It's back! The return of my most infamous fic has returned.


Stupid Village

Holly walked down the stairs.

"Holly, I was just wondering how did you age?" Cindy asked, finally noticing her daughter sudden age transplant.

"I don't know, I just like was dragged out of the street and told I was fourteen" Holly replied,putting her back to the wall.

"Why do I care? I have not seen you for a couple of years anyway, I don't care" Cindy cruelly replied.

Holly shook her head.

"Yeah, I don't really either" Holly replied.

They looked away from each other.

...

In the McQueen's. Theresa was lying on lots of money in her bedroom.

"Money, money, money" she mumbled to herself.

Myra suddenly busted through the door with Kathleen-Angle.

Theresa looked at her with confusion.

"Whoes that, auntie Myra?" she asked Myra.

"Erm, your daughter Kathleen-Angle" Myra said, in an annoyed tone.

"Oh god yes, I remember, I think" she kept saying.

Myra walked closer.

"You know, I don't understand why my daughter has to be my top priority, she doesn't exist to me really, I mean I got far more important things on my mind, like men, money and more men" Theresa told her.

"How dare you?Your suppose to love your kids, like I love Mercedes and what their names" Myra said, sitting down.

Theresa scoffed.

...

"I,m so stupid" the college headmaster finally admitted.

Jen nodded in agreement.

"Me too, how did I possibly think Esther was drinking a can, it was quite clearly a bottle" Jen replied.

"I know, the only reason I did not suspend Ruby and Sinead, is because their fit, ew did I really just say that? Their teenagers, not old enough to be legal" he added.

Jen smiled nervously.

"Right not old enough to be legal" Jen gritted her teeth.

...

Leah was writing a card.

To,

Daddy.

Daddy Brendan.

Daddy Doug.

Daddy Noah.

Daddy Ally

Daddy Ollie

Daddy Josh

[Real daddy] Billy

Daddy Lee,

Happy Fathers day,

Love from Leah xx

...

Leanne was sitting in her room, wondering why she was still in the village. So she decided to pack her bag, and somehow Ruby and Sinead were smaller enough to fit in it. They all lived happily ever after. Nobody cares about this, so lets move on.

...

Amy Barnes returns.

"Amy, where have you been?" Ste asked.

Amy signed.

"Just done what you did, gave them away and not seen them for a couple of weeks, oh my god Doug looks like Brendan" Amy said, turning towards him.

As he emerged from the bedroom.

"Is it Brendan" Ste told her.

Brendan ate a biscuit,after brushing his teeth. Somehow he eats lots and does not put on weight. Nobody cares really.

"Oh yeah, I thought it was a bit strange, wait what is Brendan doing here!" Amy shouted the last part.

"Oh he just came round, because I felt like kissing him" Ste replied to her.

Amy crossed her arms.

She locked eyes with Brendan

"Target required" Amy spoke to herself.

...

Bang! Bang! Bang! came from next door.

Kevin walked in, with a 1920s camera.

"What you doing?" Kevin asked Walker.

"I'm just shooting a gun, I nicked" Walker replied, shooting a Walker's crisp packet.

"Why are you shooting a packet of crisp?" Kevin asked.

"because they took my name" Walker replied.

"Do you think this camera, is a little big?" Kevin asked.

"Nah it do" Walker replied.

Kevin smiled,as he lifted the big camera, picking up the stand to put it on.

"Were like Jigsaw now, taking pictures of our victims" Kevin said, proud of his work.

...

Tom sat down.

"Tom, how is it you stay the same age, but Holly aged like six years?" Frankie asked.

"I don't know, maybe it's because I am a vampire" Tom said, pissed of.

...

On the Savage boat.

Liberty Savage was singing My heart will go on by Celine Dion.

"Dont sing that, our boat might sink" Dirk teased, unaware that it was actually sinking already.

"It is sinking, even I know that and that's coming from a girl who thought the Romans were in 1890" Liberty made a face.

Dirk screamed like a little girl. He started running around like a headless chicken.

Suddenly out of nowhere, three men with Villon's were playing Nearer, My God, to Thee.

"How did we get here?" one man asked.

"I don't know, the Hollyoaks producer paid us to cause were fit" the other man said

...

Kevin returned to Hollyoaks with the 1920s camera. He put it on stand.

"This is closer enough" he smiled cunningly.

"They wont spot me now" he added.

He got bumped into by some man with a panni.

"Watch it, I'm trying to stay undercover" he says, he squeals when Steven spots him from the counter. He dives on the a pillow over his head.

Steven was too loved up with Brendan to notice.

"I am just gonna put my hand behind your neck, for everyone to see, just because I feel like it" Ste says, putting his hand on his neck.

Kevin tiptoes, going behind the camera.

"And hold it there" Kevin told them.

They stood frozen, for some reason.

He took it.

"Beautiful, I just report to PC Walker, I mean Plum, I just report to PC Plum" Kevin nodded, taking his camera outside, still holding onto the stand.

Kevin skipped to the other side.

"I knew they would never catch me out" Kevin said to himself.

...

Back on the boat. Liberty, Dirk and Dodger were holding onto dear life, as the boat started to go down.

They screamed.

"Ouch" they all said, as it hit the shallow water.

"That weren't too bad" Dirk said.

"So we lost another home" Dodger said, with a sigh.

"At least, it was not your fault this time, or Bart's fault" Liberty smiled.

...

The End


End file.
